So here's mine: One day, much like Bea Arthur, you are going to be dead.

So enjoy this season. Your kid needs to be changed? Tell her to grow up and do it herself. Your boyfriend wants to go out to dinner? Agree to meet up at your favorite Thai restaurant at 7 and then just don't show up - that will give you the longest amount of time before he inevitably shows up and ruins everything. Oh, things are going bad at work? Road trip to Montreal for an away game.

Live like you were dying right? I got news for you compadre, that song's not about going to the hospital and getting a series of tests, it's about kicking a bull in the dick just because. And when you blow all your money on Flyers gear, tickets, soft pretzels, and Flyer themed drinks, and then wake up deathly hungover, 100% broke, and probably in jail, you need to figure out how to get out of there. Maybe turn your brother in for being a terrorist. Then figure out a way to get some money (robbery I suppose? if you're dying tomorrow it won't matter). Or turn in your neighbor for shooting a cop maybe. And then watch those Flyers again.

George O'Malley didn't make it this season. Neither did Dumbledore. You know why everyone was crying at Michael Jackson's 17 day funeral? Because he's going to miss the Flyers season. Enjoy it while it lasts because it's probably almost over. And the Flyers are more important than any of that other shit they write poetry about.