Flyers Alternate Captaincy Tree
Written by Ryan   
Tuesday, 06 October 2009 07:02

Standard Away Games - Jeff Carter and Chris Pronger

Standard Home Games - Simon Gagne and Kimmo Timonen

First level replacement for any of those four players - Daniel Briere

If Ray Lamontagne played in the arena within the week - Rabbit wears both A's

If one of the Standards and Daniel Briere are not in the lineup, and it's a weekday - Ian Laperriere

If one of the Standards and Daniel Briere are not in the lineup, and it's on the weekend - Daniel Day Lewis (50th contract)

If the game is against the Predators - Scott Hartnell will join Kimmo regardless of location

If it's a home game against the Red Wings - the crazy guy behind the goalie with the signs will wear one A and whoever wins an arm wrestling competition between Gags and Kimmo will wear the other

If Daniel Carcillo threatens John Stevens he will be given the A.

If it's during the Olympics Arron Asham and Riley Cote will wear the A's during all practices. And games.

If the Hurricanes come to Philly and the game is a sell out Rod Brind'Amour will wear one of the A's, if it is not a sell out Mike Richards' C will be raised to the A power and Simon Gagne will wear the other

If it's raining, but cold enough that it should be snowing, and Darroll Powe can explain why this is happening, he will get to wear one of the A's with the longest tenured other Alternate, depending on location.

Should Darroll Powe not be able to explain there will be a game of hockey H-O-R-S-E during warm-ups on the opposition's net. The winner will get the A.

If the team bus breaks down and someone can fix it they will get to wear all three letters during that night's game.

If the team plane breaks down in midair and someone can land the plane that person will wear a P for pilot and the rest of the letters will be abolished. A hand job will also be given from a Delta Dental Ice girl of age.

If Mike Richards is missing a game and the Flyers are going with three A's the third one will be bestowed to whoever grew up closest to the arena. If this is a home game the honor will obviously be bestowed to Blair Betts, who everyone knows spent from when he was born until he turned 11 living in the under belly of the Spectrum.

If the Flyers go out to eat at this awesome Italian restaurant or a place with really good wings and it turns out that Pizza Hut made the food then Ray Emery and Brian Boucher will be Alternate Captains.

If the Phillies win the World Series Brad Lidge will get to wear one of the A's regardless of what all you haters say.

If Absolut Vodka puts out a commercial that shows a bunch of kids doing something stupid and then actually getting arrested for it like they should, and they still say "Yeah, I was there" at the end but it's in a full courtroom where they're being charged for killing 200 people in an abandoned gas station then I will get the A.

If Fran had homemade tacos last night (50% chance) then he will wear the A.

Under no circumstance will Matt Carle wear the A, although he will get 50 points this season.



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Comments (4)Add Comment
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written by kimy31, October 07, 2009
LMFAO! Glad to see I'm not the only one who sees this as a big joke.
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written by a guest, October 06, 2009
Nice. Making who wears the "C" and the "A" irrelevant with this team.
FGSB::Fran
written by a guest, October 06, 2009
holy shit dude, I made chicken tacos last night! How did you know that?
If Jim Jackson says "left-handed larceny" Steve Coates must wear the A
written by a guest, October 06, 2009
HAHAHAHAHA
This is brilliant. Nice work. And I'm loving the new logo. Keep it up!

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