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Written by Ryan
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Friday, 26 February 2010 09:02 |
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Today Flyers Goal Scored By is officially the official Flyers blog turned Team USA blog of the 2010 Winter Olympics.
Thank you for reading Team USA Goal Scored By…
Onto the day's story lines.
1. The LangenEagle is ready to party. As you may have noticed the LangenEagle came out of its shell on Wednesday afternoon and is prepared to be released on the Fins today. Specifically it is ready to butt fuck the entire team - and not in a 'people on the internet are so homophobic and perpetuate anti-gay thinking' kind of way. In the way that a male dog will butt fuck another male dog just to let him know who's boss. Kind of like prison, I guess, with out all the notes carved into your leg while you're sleeping that say 'meet me in the 3rd stall after extra sloppy joe lunch.'
2. Finland beat Belarus 5-1. Finland beat Germany 5-0. Finland lost to Sweden 3-0. Finland beat the Czech Republic 2-0. When they've won it's been because of shutdowns in their own end. In their sole loss Sweden scored 6:41 into the game. I'm going to go out on a snowy limb here and say that if Team USA scores first, and in the first period, we win. If not Finland will wear us down and rub us off.
3. Finish Forwards - Nicklas Hagman is leading the way up front for Finland with 5 points in 4 games. Mikko Koivu is second with 4 assists, but then it's a balanced effort below that with 9 players have 2 points (including Kimmo) and a handful with 1. There's not one single player we need to watch out for. Selanne, even though he is the Olympics' all time leading scorer is playing like it's his last season after saying it. Skull Face has a goal and an assist in 4 games. The Ruutu's and Valtteri Filppula can be dangerous. There's no OV, Crosby, or 2006 Forsberg on this team. But there wasn't even a Patrik Juhlin on Switzerland and we didn't exactly run away with that one. The Fins win as a team. And we need to curb them. American. History. X. Read it.
4. We'll be going against Flames goalie Miikka Kiprusoff this afternoon. Earlier this season the Flyers scored 3 goals against him on 27 shots. I would like to think Team USA could at least tie the Flyers. In December of 2003 Jeremy Roenick scored on Kiprusoff. He'll be in the building. That's going to intimidate the Finnish net minder.
5. We're fucking AMERICANS. I know everyone hates us but just like a parent who tells the principal to 'go fuck yourself' when he calls and says your son's been suspended, this is our chance to say 'hey world, we know you hate us, but the LangenEagle is going to butt fuck all of you. Lin 'em up." We have 32 medals. Finland has 3. We're over 10x better than them. That's called math, Houdini. Look it up.
6. David Backes feels it. Ryan Kesler feels it. Bobby Ryan feels it. Brian Rafalski is playing like a deep see fisherman who casts the hook right into the fish's mouth first time every time. Let's get physical with these socialists. Dump and collect. Except for Kimmo, Finland's defense might be less organized than Switzerland's. You have Lasse who couldn't hack it, Janne who couldn't hack it, Joni who is a liability, a shitty Coyote, and a Sabre and Canuck. Play in their end and play physical and we win.
Not that any of you care but I'm considering going with the DVR today. I want to watch at 3 but that would be all alone Olympic hockey watching, which is a little scary. So as of 3 I'll be off the Twitter, the comments, and maybe even my phone. If you want to talk about how badly we're going to BF the Fins you have 6 hours. Go.
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